Haylor Swyles

[Let me clarify I am in no way affiliated to the One Direction fandom that identify themselves as 'Directioners'. Nothing against them as a whole, though. Just particular little members.]

[I will, however, be using GIFs in this post. (First GIF-inclusive post!)]

The past few (well, two) days on Twitter, a contagious, deadly disease name has been trending...is it the swine flu? Bird flu? Is it back? 

 ...no, it's name is Haylor Swyles!

 Best fandom in the world, my foot. [slow, sarcastic applause] Hats off to you, Directioners [edit: Directioners and 0.1% of you who aren't because no one gets as hit in the feels as you guys]. Some of you are really mean shits. Look what you've done; http://www.ibtimes.com/why-haylor-swyles-trending-twitter-one-direction-fans-despise-harry-styles-taylor-swift-rumors#.UMqc1lRJ-RA.twitter. And this is only one of such articles. 

 I'm not saying all of you are mean. I know some Directioners out there can maturely respect Haylor Swyles even if they don't support it. But really? 'Haylor Swyles Vaginal Disease'? Allow me, (a Swiftie, just saying), to clarify and inform you on some things you might not have known did not know before you posed your argument on Twitter.

 Exhibit A: "Taylor's gone through 27 exes in the past 4 years/13 exes in the past 3 years and she is a whore..."

 Did you hear something? That is the sound of your upper lip meeting your lower lip and shutting up. Now that you've shut up, I will graciously tell you that in the past 7 years since Taylor's first début, she's only had 5 boyfriends. Five. Probably less than you'd go through in two years, huh? And to further justify these points, here they are, in chronological order: Joe Jonas, Taylor Lautner, John Mayer, Jake Gyllenhaal and Conor Kennedy. Can you name me any others that have been confirmed and verified? I don't think so. 

 Exhibit B: "Hating them won't make Harry love me, but loving them won't make him love me either, so what's the point?"

 Maybe if you respected them and left them alone, Harry wouldn't have such doubts about his loyal fans. It's his decision who he gets with, and your vehement opposing isn't going to magically make erase every trace of Haylor Swyles on this planet. Here's a cookie for trying, though. Like Kingsley says...

 Exhibit C: "The reason why I don't want Haylor Swyles is because when they break up, she'll write a song about him saying how mean he is and he'll get hated on..."

  Have you sincerely ever heard any of her songs? 

 Okay, so Taylor's had five boyfriends the past few days. They break up. She releases a song. But have you actually looked through the lyrics? I take that statement above as a no. Here's an example for you - no, wait, let me show you all of them.

 Joe Jonas: Last Kiss, Forever And Always
 Forever And Always Lyrics, Last Kiss Lyrics.

 Taylor Lautner: Back To December
 Back To December Lyrics

 Do you see anything with a sliver of antagonism yet?

 John Mayer: Dear John, Story Of Us
 Dear John Lyrics, Story Of Us Lyrics

 Dear John has that sliver of meanness, but he was mean to her. He was, so there. He had it coming.

 Jake Gyllenhaal: Red, We Are Never Ever Getting Back Together
 Red Lyrics, WANEGBT Lyrics

 Conor Kennedy: Everything Has Changed
 Everything Has Changed Lyrics

 If you haven't realized, Taylor writes and sings about how she misses her ex-boyfriends. She does not write mean lyrics about how they are assholes/douches (with the exception of John Mayer). Get your facts right and stop being ignorant peasants. You would be doing the world a favour of reducing the number of facepalms the Earth has to go through. (Did you know that everytime you make an ignorant comment, a fairy dies? So for the sake of the dwindling fairy population, I'd like to beseech the public to stop.)

 Exhibit D: "'Haylor Swyles' Directioners: No. Swifties: No. Obama: No. World: No. Queen Elizabeth: No. Aliens: No."

 This format itself is overused enough. Obama, Queen Elizabeth and Aliens probably don't even know about Haylor Swyles. Speaking on their behalf is fine. But speaking on behalf of Swifties? Not happening, buddy. If you're going to speak on behalf of us and imply that we don't respect/support Taylor's relationship(s), be sure that you're not going to have any of us as friends. Because we Swifties respect Taylor's relationships. We don't talk shit about them. Have you seen anyone go "I'm a Swiftie and I strongly oppose Haylor Swyles and  [blah blah blah insert something offensive here in less than 140 characters]"? I don't think so.

 Exhibit E: "Every time I hear the word name (bless you, darling) "Haylor Swyles" I would just jump into a pool of spiders and let them eat my human flesh."

 Well, if that's your method of de-stressing, have fun with that. Only, where do you get spiders that eat human flesh? Let me know, because I'm having a hard time finding them.

 Exhibit F: "I'm surprised 'Haylor Swyles' has been trending for two days straight. That's longer than most of Taylor's relationships."

 Way to go, Tyler Oakley. 

 Exhibit G: "Swifites started #DirectionerDeserveCancer."

 Actually, that was started by a fake Swiftie troll account. And her ass has been banned off Twitter.

 Exhibit H: "'Haylor Swyles' is the reason this world is ending on 21/12/12."

 Actually, as Kingsley has kindly put it...

 Exhibit I: "Maybe Taylor Swift should have a song talking about how she is the problem."

 Boo you. http://fasterthanyoucansaysabotoge.tumblr.com/post/37376251106/taylor-talking-about-how-maybe-she-is-the-problem

 So there. I hope I have cleared up all the misconceptions on Taylor's side. Thank you for your kind attention - I ain't even mad. Just because I love conveying my emotions in GIFs, have a few last ones to basically explain how I feel.

 Ciao. x